Leave it to a lawyer….

A priest, a doctor and a lawyer are stuck behind a particularly slow group of golfers. After three holes, they complain to the club secretary.

“Sorry, chaps, that’s a group of blind firemen,” he explains, “They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from burning down last year, so we let them play here for free any time they want.”

“That’s so sad,” says the priest, “I’ll say a prayer for them tonight.”

“Good idea,” says the doctor, “I’ll contact my ophthalmologist friend and see if there’s anything he can do.”

“That’s all very well,” says the lawyer, “but why can’t they play at night?”

Little Johnny

Little Johnny is asked by his teacher: “What is the most wonderful thing in life for you?”

“Well, sir,” says Johnny, “when I think about it, the most wonderful thing in life for me is a pretty girl with big t*ts and a wet pussy.”

The teacher is infuriated and writes a note that Little Johnny has to give to his father.

The next day, the teacher asks: “So, Johnny, what did your daddy say?”

“Well, sir,” says Johnny, “we sat down in the living room and drank an espresso, read your note and talked, then we poured ourselves a cognac, smoked a joint and talked some more. In the end, we decided you must be a fucking queer.”

Various Short Jokes XOXO

What came first: the chicken or the egg?
The rooster

Friend : I understand how you can get Sam from Samantha, I also understand how you can get Matt from Matthew…….but how do you get Dick from Richard?!!?
Me: If you ask nicely!!…….:D

Premature Ejaculation: The Movie
Coming soon.

Q: Who is a gynecologist?
A: He is the only fool on the earth who looks for problems in a place where others find pleasure!

Q: Why do men ask for a woman’s hand in marriage?
A: Because they are tired of using their own

Q: What’s common between men and video player?
A: Both go backward…forward.backward…forward…stop and eject

Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman’s period?
A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5-7 days and if it doesn’t come means You are FUCKED…CategoriesRiddles